I’m so tired I don’t even know that I can type much. Since getting back from vacation I haven’t stopped much. So, here’s just a “list” of what’s going on:
*I came home from my trip with a cold. Must have been viral because I had fever and exhaustion for about 48 hours and then gradually got better. Kept me home from work last Wed. AND kept me from meeting the mountains of laundry I needed to do.
*last Thursday I did work but was still sick. I spent a long while on the phone with another mom that I’d been wanting to get to know. If you remember back to the post about the dance, Nic is one of Brittney’s good friends. He and Britt spend lots of time on the phone/myspace/IM, etc. Turns out that Nic has a 14 y/o brother, Trevor who also is often on the phone at the same time. They also have 3 younger brothers…yep, 5 boys!! I talked with their mom Michelle…wonderful lady. Seems that Trevor wanted Brittney to go to homeschool day at Six Flags…just ’cause he didn’t have anyone to hang out with. After that long talk, I was the brave and naughty mom and let my little girl go off with a van of boys (and mom) while skipping school. Funny, after almost 10 hours together, Trevor and Brittney came home holding hands. So …. that’s one new romance in the Paul home.
*Friday morning I worked and then planned to take the little ones to play and then p/u Sarah from school early since Britt was off galavanting. A preschool bus of 40+preschoolers pulled up just as I was getting out and I declined allowing my two little ones in that mix. Ended up waiting awhile to see my mother at work. [side note: my parents divorce is officially final. my father really did just walk out of my life without so much as a goodbye, an address or a phone number. My children repeatedly ask for him and the older ones want to know if they will ever see him again, to which I have no answer.] Let’s see….oh, then I had lunch with a friend and her husband and finally made it to check out Sarah. Her treat was a chick-fil-a milkshake and then lots of riding around to pick up the other kids. Thankfully the six flags trip cancelled out our usual friday kayak and dance practices.
*Saturday we cleaned house for hours, another wonderful mom took Brittney to kayak for me and I was able to do most of the laundry.
*Sunday…..ah, yes…..mothers day.
I wish that I could say that I had a great attitude about understanding my husband and his reasoning for not doing things. I wish I could say that I let it roll off my back with ease as I got out of bed, showered, fed and dressed not only myself but 6 kids and took them to church. I wish I could say that I sat in church repentant of my bad attitude and thankful for my blessing of a husband that provides. But – I’m not that good of a person………..
Yep, he STAYED IN BED…and was still there when I slammed the door at 9:55am on my way to church. When I came home to order pizza to take to my mothers house he was dressed and ready to go with me. I looked him in the eye and told him he wasn’t invited. What ensued was a long-overdue but very serious and quite challenging coversation. The highlights being…I want him to show me love like he did in our first years together and he responded with he’d spend the day making a list of the things that I needed to change in order for that to happen. I went on to have a completely relaxing day on my mothers back deck with my children, my mother and one of her friends. We even made homemade strawberry icecream. [another side note: two years ago on mothers day my father DEMANDED that we NOT make icecream because he was on a diet and it would …cause him to stumble in his walk… and we followed his command….rolleyes, shaking of head here] I did come home at a decent hour and get the kids to bed and even went to R to ask for my list WITHOUT presenting one of my own (giggle…I just think it was awfully big of me to not make my own list…) Instead I go a heartfelt apology, a short but productive conversation and an agreement to go to marriage counseling. No gifts, no cards, no poems, no handprints…. but possibly a move toward still being married next year on mothers day – guess I’ll take it and smile.
*ok, let’s see….. Monday is my work.all.day…day.
*Tuesday work until noon, shop for Sarah until 2, pick up kids, girls have end of the year chorus concert to get ready for, I run out to Sams for diapers and to pick up the above mentioned Trevor. Another new romance in our home is Sarah’s boyfriend Lee. I hear he’s a bit of a player and not really serious about her, ….. but she’s smiling a lot more lately. Sadly she’s already broken the 15 min phone call rule and is grounded from the phone. ….sigh…. ANYWAY, the girls were late getting to the concert but at least arrived before it began. I’m uploading pics now but will have to add them later…gosh it’s LATE….The highlight of the evening was the 8th graders singing “You Raise Me Up”…..yes, I cried.
*Wed. I had to sub for 1st grade ALL day. Plus the other 1st grade teacher left at 11:30 so I had both classes until 2. Plus my 2 and 4 year olds. BIG YAWN. excuse me. Then church tonight….oh and there was no clean underwear OR uniform clothes for tomorrow, remind me to switch out the laundry before I hit the sack.
Let’s see, Friday night kayak and dance. Saturday is kayak races from 8-5, a bday party for Sarahs friend 2-6, 8th grade formal @ 7pm (hair, makeup, dress…check). Sunday church. Monday field day at work. Tues graduation at work. Thurs end of year program at work. Friday last day of school.
That’s my list for the moment. I’ll add pics sometimes tomorrow.
Respect after Divorce 